Low self-esteem means that a person has a distorted view of themselves, believing that they are not a good enough person to be liked, loved and be happy. They tend to have a low opinion of themselves. We can all have days when our self-esteem wanes, but continuous low self-esteem can severely impact on a person’s life.

Low Self-esteem can effect:-

Relationships. For example, not being in or keeping a personal relationship. Having few or no friends. Allowing others to be dominant or abusive. Not voicing or meeting your own personal needs from a relationship.

Work. Difficulty in obtaining work, keeping a job or progressing in your career. Feeling insecure about your strengths. Lack of confidence in your abilities, and fearful of asserting yourself, or giving a presentation to a group of people. Not being taken seriously, or feeling ineffectual.

Confidence. Low self-esteem can reduce self-confidence. Having a low opinion of your capabilities. Feeling and fearing failure. Under achievement although you have the ability to progress.

Life Choices. Limits your risk taking so new opportunities and experiences are avoided. Play safe, rather than broaden your life out. Limit your social experiences and reduce your social network. Avoid responsibility and personal growth.

Symptoms of low self-esteem can be:-

Limited motivation



Negative about the future


Self-absorbed negatively – wishing your life was more full

Negative thinking about your abilities

Believing or fearing you are a failure

Feeling hopeless and depressed


Low self-esteem can sometimes be traced back to childhood events, such as family conflict, neglect, early loss, ill health, physical disability, learning disability such as dyslexia can all contribute to low self-esteem.

Some people have never talked about early childhood trauma, or did but still have more to process in order to increase their self-esteem. Others have never made a connection between significant life events and their difficulty in achieving a sense of self-worth and happiness in their lives and relationships.

Counselling may be effective in increasing self-esteem  - it is never too late to change things in our adult lives. You can gain personal insight and understanding, become less judgmental towards yourself, and begin to view yourself much more positively.

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